3 actions to build your autonomy after a relationship with a narcissistic pervert manipulator

How can you quickly disengage and build your autonomy after a relationship with a narcissistic pervert manipulator or a violent man? This autonomy may seem difficult beforehand because after a toxic relationship your self-esteem inevitably takes a hit, at the same time as the physical blows or the blows of those linked to the murderous formulas crush you. On a daily basis, this behavior that you experience also makes you often feel generally tired: you sleep badly, you eat a little no matter what, you often gain weight and you therefore decrease in energy, you have this deep feeling of helplessness. that wins you over and that you can’t get away with.  So how do you get out of this spiral and rebuild yourself professionally after a relationship with a narcissistic pervert manipulator or abusive man? 

Three actions to be implemented today which will also be completed by the next two depending on whether you are an employee or whether you are independent. So stay in touch with the channel and don’t forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel and click on the notifications tab, to be really informed of all the new videos so as not to miss the ones that will really give you the boost which is necessary for you. 

“To establish true self-esteem, we need to focus on our successes and forget about failures and negative aspects of our lives.  » – Denis Waitley

1- Take stock of your professional experience  The first action to put in place, whether you are independent or salaried is to redo your CV and / or your professional presentation (to be reused for brochures, an about on your website for example). Take stock of your training and your professional experience: classify them both chronologically and thematically so as to gather and have in mind your specificities and the qualities that you have developed during your apprenticeships and during your practice in professional situation. 

2- Take stock of skills and vocational training  The second step is to take an interest in everything that is a skills assessment and professional training: indeed when you are an employee or even when you are independent you may be entitled to strategic sessions that will take stock of your situation, knowledge and skills that you can improve. It can also naturally be a university education: I personally resumed my studies at 43, I validated a Master in private law and I also took a whole training in Neuro-Linguistic Programming in the United States with the Doctor. Richard Bandler, the co-founder of NLP. Getting back to it at a certain age is difficult, at least that’s what we can say to ourselves, but it takes courage, by that I mean effort and putting all your heart into the adventure, at all ages: when I was 20 years old and I was also a student at the time when I validated a Master of Modern Letters and a License in Law, it was also complicated to organize and then to do faced with everything, the weight of the violence I had suffered as a child, the construction of my life at the time… Age is therefore really no excuse…  Read also: Why write your story when you have been the victim of violence?

3- Set up a personal and professional network 

The third action to be implemented is that of a network that is both personal and professional: the personal network is in connection with people who have the same affinities, the same tastes, the same hobbies as you and with whom you will be able to share activities, tips and tricks about these passions that will allow you to learn more and progress. 

There are various and varied groups and networks on the internet; it’s up to you to find the ones that suit you. I invite you to join the free private support group on Facebook.

You also have professional networks related to your activities or related fields. It is not a question of dispersing oneself either, but of developing complementary mutual aid insofar as one cannot know everything and control everything. 

To go further, I have created a Support Group for Women Victims of Violence and you will find how to contact me if you want to be part of it.

And if you want to go to the next level, that we see your personal situation together to find the strategy that suits you, I am naturally here to accompany you in coaching towards this liberation and to build as quickly as possible this free independent and happy life. that you deserve.

Agnès de Reulle

Coach, Expert in liberation from domestic and family violence & in controlling the stress of legal proceedings
Article written for Positive Words.